running away
Well- it's official the middle child has officially announced he is going to run away. He is the one who most resembles his ex- bikini underwear wearing, wing contest eating, father. DIFFICULT and drives me crazy. i love him dearly but, they say there is a thing with middle children? is this true? I was the oldest. Steakbellie seems to (believe it or not) be the most normal and he is the middle. However, everyone I talk to says," Oh, the middle child is always the one that gives you gray hair. I worry about him. He is definately creative minded, can put together anything you ask, will build you a house if you give him the materials. But, school is not his thing. It is hard for him and he knows it. I of all people should understand him the most. I of all people should have the most tolerance. But I of all people, am the one that makes excuses and enables him. And then I yell. And now he is going to run away. God- I must have said that a thousand times growing up. The difference between me and him. he's smart enough to figure out a way to do it!
posted by gerberdaisy @ 7:02 PM
9 Comments:
I am a middle child. I would say my preference is to be left alone, so maybe the yelling is driving him to the feeling of wanting to run away. I would be playing nicely, all by myself and my older brother would come along and destroy what I was working on, or he'd beat me up. I think there is definitely something to being a middle, but I'm not sure what it is exactly. Maybe it lies in not being the focus - the eldest is the eldest and resents the middle coming along and stealing all the thunder. The eldest is furthest along in maturity and development and the youngest is always the youngest and the cutest and most in need of attention. The middle is a conundrum - I want attention, yet I want to be left alone. Try not to yell - you're a great mom, he won't go anywhere.
hummm...
he is more of the loner. You are right. You're actually dead on.
I hate to say it but it gets interrpreted as "lazy". and I'm not sure thats it. I think the "I want attention, but leave me alone" is a good anology.
Hmmm...
You know, I was the middle too.
"I want attention but leave me alone" is pretty darn accurate.
Ironically Birdy this is YOUR Godchild!!!
I'm a middle as well, and I feeel JUST like that!!!!!!!!!
It's funny - but I got that lazy comment all the time in school. I used to get the "He tests well and is a smart boy, if he would just apply himself..." shit.
I have all my report cards growing up (Birdy + Steakbellie are NOT surprised) - EVERY SINGLE ONE ofthem says that too - "...If he would just apply himself..." Why should I apply myself if some more aggressive type is going to do it anyway? (i just realized that's been my M.O. through life - yikes) But left to my own devices, i'm capable of really good things. Seek his input, he may not offer it up (i don't), and you'll find fully formed, insightful opinions. Listen to him. we all want attention, just in different ways.
I was the oldest (but the "if you'd just apply himself" mantra was chanted at me daily for 20+ years), but in my family the middle kid seems to be the most normal and well-adjusted.
I think it could be because I'm six years older than my brother. That meant that I paved the way for him, trained the parents, so to speak, but I was old enough to leave him be. (When you're nine, you don't want to play with a three-year-old. When you're fourteen and smoking cigarettes, hanging out with an eight-year-old is torture.)
"I want attention, but leave me alone" describes my cat, actually.
When I was a wee lad I ran away on several occasions. It never occurred to me that tricycles leave rather distinctive tracks on a gravel road. It took me a few years to figure out how the 'rents could always find me...
Your cat.
Perfect.
lol.
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